Romance needs more than roses

As a bride planning her wedding day, it's easy to get caught up in the romance surrounding the occasion. Times spent with your fiancé are especially dreamy, and it's hard to imagine a time when you're romance won't be a bed of roses. But after the wedding, it takes more than chocolates and wine to keep romance alive.

"Flowers, chocolates and those things are very nice but they won't make the relationship better long-term," says Elaine Watson, a relationship expert. "It's not just about that rose . . . it's about watering that rose and keeping it fresh."

Experts say there are many ways to create and sustain a mutually fulfilling relationship. However, it's important to keep in mind that every relationship is unique and what may work for some couples, may not work for you. The key to a long-lasting and loving marriage is to recognize that while passion and romance may wane, true intimacy only grows richer with
time.

Here are some strategies for enhancing your relationship and staying connected to your partner.

• Accept your differences.
  Even the most compatible couples have their differences but, instead of
  trying to change their partners, they learn to accept and embrace these
  differences. Loving someone completely means accepting the whole person,
  including his or her faults and limitations.
  
  
• Make time for each other.
  No matter how hectic your schedules may be, experts say it's imperative
  that you make time for one another in order to sustain your emotional
  connection. Try to spend some uninterrupted time together every day, even if
  it's only for 10 to 15 minutes, and set aside at least one evening a week to
  be alone and nurture your relationship. Focus on you and your partner and
  avoid talking about work, kids or other responsibilities.
  
  
• Become reacquainted with your partner.
  Remember those intimate talks you had when you were first dating when
  you revealed your innermost thoughts, dreams, fears and aspirations? Sharing
  your secrets and feelings is important to keeping the romance alive.
  
  
• Do something romantic every day.
  Being romantic in the early stages of a relationship comes naturally to
  most couples but, over time, the exchange of gifts, compliments and other
  romantic gestures tends to wane. Keeping the romance alive in your marriage
  is one of the best ways to express your love and appreciation for your
  spouse and will help keep your relationship fresh.
  
  
• Be creative
  Nothing's sexier than a healthy dose of imagination.
  
  
• Be young at heart
  Treat every experience like it's your first time.
  
  
• Be spontaneous
  Love, like an open flame, is spontaneous and uncontrollable.
  
  
• Be sensual
  Sensuality is a state of mind, an intimate connection.
  
  
• Be just the way you are
  You can't be anything to anyone if you can't be yourself
  

Start early when selecting a wedding gown

Whatever step it is in the planning process, choosing wedding clothes is high up on the to-do list. Mary Sollog, a registered bridal consultant with Tiffanys, says it can take as much as 16 weeks to order your wedding gown.

Her advice? Shop early.

Assuming that 16 weeks is law, don't forget to factor in extra time if a formal portrait is desired. Sollog said brides must allow time for the sitting, the selection of the pose and having the finished product ready. "And you can't do any of that until you've had the dress altered."

If a dress is shown in a magazine and marketed aggressively, it's called a formal gown, Sollog said. The gown is going to have to be special ordered "and it's going to take a while to get there." But, Sollog said: "Many of those manufacturers make the identical gown without the train and the price does fall off considerably. Basically, it's because everybody dreams of that great big train dragging behind them."

But, without the train, the dresses are great for outdoor weddings and dancing, Sollog said. "A lot of girls are going: 'What a good idea. And I save how much money?'"

Then there are the bridesmaids' dresses.

Shriner said it can be "more of a headache" selecting bridesmaids dresses than the wedding dress. Regardless, for bridesmaids' dresses, "the timing rule of thumb is 12 weeks," Sollog said. "We will not order any of the dresses until we have the information for all of them because we want them cut from the same dye-lot of fabric so they're all true to the same color. That 12 weeks is from the date that they are all ordered - by us not the customer."

Choosing a bridesmaids dress

This season's bridesmaids dresses are elegant and sophisticated, and break away from past trends of bright colors and poofy sleeves. Since you’re bridesmaids are often your closest friends, you might consider inviting them to peruse the latest fashions from these couture houses and others.

According to experts, there are four basic trends: Lots of strapless dresses for a barer look, color, three-quarter length sleeves, and layering of sheer fabric.

Designer Donna Morgan’s collection features a tea length, strapless dress that is very bare, and very graceful. But if you want to cover up when you're in the house of worship, it has a net stole, which is also very pretty. Brides might select this gown for an afternoon wedding, or an evening wedding.

Watters & Watters, a design company based in Dallas, is committed to creating more dresses that aren’t so cutesy. "There really are two directions for bridesmaids' dresses, according to the company’s owner, Maria Price. 'They are either slim and sleek and kind of Audrey Hepburn-like or they are fuller tulle looks reminiscent of Grace Kelly.''

There are so many options available to brides and their attendants today, whether you want your entire party to look alike, the traditional approach, or whether you prefer their attire simply complement each other as well as the bridal gown.

When it comes to color, ''spring is lighter,'' according to Prince. ''We're seeing more pale colors,'' she says, ''more like ready-to-wear.'' Honeydew, sage green and moonlight are just a few of the latest hues from Watters & Watters.

At Dessy Creations, silvery platinum satin dresses with matching stoles are shimmering for the bridal party. Gray and all its lighter, shimmering shades are as popular for the bridal party as they are in ready-to-wear. And if you don't like silver, Dessy's interactive ''color-finder'' will allow you to see any dress in any color with a click of the mouse on www.dessy.com.

The shape of bridesmaids' dresses echo that of bridal gowns, says Prince. ''They're mostly strapless,'' she says, ''or they have a soft, modified V-neckline. Square necklines usually aren't as flattering.''

Watters & Watters' spring collection features elegant simplicity: a pink iridescent sleeveless chiffon dress has a matching chiffon scarf; a honeydew-colored strapless dress with shirring bodice falls into a full-length tulle skirt, also with matching scarf. Other not-so-typical bridesmaids' dresses from Watters & Watters include a white rayon matka two-piece sleeveless top with buttons and loops down the front with a fabric flower pin at the back waist and a slim floor-length skirt.

Soft pink is another favorite hue this spring for the bridal party. Softened up with chiffon, Jim Hjelm's Occasions pink bridesmaid's satin princess dress features a cowl drape neckline another popular detail on dresses this spring.

While most brides still want their wedding party to wear matching dresses, there is room for change. Don't be afraid to set your best friend apart. ''Many brides will want their maid of honor to wear a different dress that coordinates with the other maids,'' says Prince.

Bianchi's Tiamo collection features ''Mix & Match Maids,'' an interchangeable array of dresses for the bridal party that color coordinate, but feature different silhouettes and shapes, ''because no two bridesmaids are exactly alike.''

At Vera Wang Maids, the bridal party can choose from dresses in a variety of silhouettes from halters to strapless to off-the-shoulder shapes all in the same color tones. Buttery mellow-yellow golds are one of the most popular color combinations for bridesmaids.

The rest of the bridal party junior bridesmaids and flower girls follow suit with the bridesmaids, coordinating colors and flowers. But let's face it, the ring bearer and the flowers girls can wear almost anything and upstage the bride.

While the junior bridesmaids often wear dresses that are miniature replicas of the other bridal attendants, the flower girls usually wear more traditional full-skirted dresses that fall to midcalf. In creamy white organza or taffeta, perhaps smocked and trimmed with ribboned sashes and flowers, these dresses are appropriate any time of year, complete with ballet slippers or Mary Janes, white tights and anklets.

When it comes to Mom's wedding attire, there is an incredible selection of evening clothes available in specialty stores or bridal boutiques. However, the mother of the bride or groom does not have to vanish into the background of the bridal party. Instead, an elegant evening dress or cocktail suit, that can be worn again, can express individual personality, as well as complement the fashions of the rest of the wedding party.