How Do I Choose The Wedding Party

Choosing the wedding party can be one of the most pleasurable or daunting experiences you will encounter while planning your wedding.

While there are no set rules on how many attendants are required, there are some standard guidelines to assist you.

On average a wedding party will consist of 4 to 6 bridesmaids and groomsmen. This number may vary depending on the wishes of the marrying couple. Generally, the more formal a wedding the larger the wedding party typically is. And, as a "rule of thumb", the number of groomsmen in a wedding party should be equal to the number of wedding guests divided by 50 - with a corresponding number of bridesmaids. For example, if you were expecting 400 guests at your wedding, protocol would dictate 8 bridesmaids and 8 groomsmen. Interestingly enough while it normal on occasion to have more groomsmen than bridesmaids in the wedding party - there should never more bridesmaids than groomsmen.

Also please remember when planning your wedding party that "cost matters." The larger the wedding party the more costly your wedding will be. Each additional bridesmaid comes replete with requisite bouquet, gift, and accommodations. So if cost is an issue, the more does not necessarily mean the merrier.

Be thoughtful when narrowing your selection list. This can be quite the task if you have many friends and loved ones. Remember, you can't include everyone. If there are some women that you want to be involved but you can't have them as bridesmaids, ask them to be Honorary Bridesmaids. (Also known as Honor Attendants). They will attend the rehearsal dinner, bridesmaids' luncheon, and sit with the family in the front of the church on the special day.

Finally, and most importantly, be attentive to the needs of your attendants. Invitations to be in the wedding party should be offered at least six months in advance. This will allow adequate time for those involved to make travel arrangements, purchase attire, and save money. Don't be offended if someone you ask opts out of the wedding. Being a bridesmaid or groomsmen requires a great financial/time commitment and for many of us those two commodities are in short supply. Therefore do not assume that a "no" is indicative of a lack of interest or a personal slight. Many people simply cannot afford to be involved.